Advent Calendar Day Eight

Wotcha!

Today's advent calendar window is a bittersweet one, in a way. But bitter enough that it warrants a mention...

Day Eight

Those Fucking Direct Line Adverts

I know everyone has to eat, but words can't express my disappointment in the stars of this series of adverts. Remember they used to have Stephen Fry and Paul Merton providing the voices of an animated phone and mouse before? Fairly unobtrusive, weren't they? And you didn't have waves of ambivalence flooding over you whenever they were on. I'm still a big fan of both men and their work, despite advertising for the insurance arm of RBS.

However, these ones are different. Now, I like Alexander Armstrong. I like Amelia Bullmore. Hell, I even like Chris Addison. But this poorly scripted, unfunny, unwelcome campaign is really starting to get on my tits. "Free cake!" Hahahahahahahahaha! Oh, can you imagine? "Sorry! But I would say, that's very lucky!" Oh, you witty advert writers! 

I realise that the trio are probably getting a tidy sum for appearing in this shitfest, but they are primarily comic actors, each of whom have also written. Would it have been too much to ask for the advertising agency to fork out that little bit more to get them to script edit the adverts at the very least, perhaps rewrite them from the ground up to infuse a little bit of wit? I'm even more disappointed in learning that the (usually) mighty Graham Linehan directed them, and there's a comedy genius right there. Oh, and the Direct Line website describes the adverts as 'hilarious'. You'd think they would be. But they aren't. But they should be. But they aren't. But they should be. And that's my dilemma.

But they aren't.